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When talking about fertility treatments, the focus is usually on the medical and technical aspects of the process, leaving emotional preparation in the background. However, as Raquel Urteaga, Head of the Psychology Unit specialised in Assisted Reproduction at Clinica Tambre, explains, having the right psychological support from the beginning of the treatment can make all the difference in the way we face this emotionally challenging journey.
Why is it important to prepare the patient psychologically before the treatment?
The emotional background of each patient varies according to her personal situation. Most women who come to an assisted reproduction clinic have been trying to conceive for years without success, which often causes significant emotional exhaustion. In contrast, women seeking motherhood on their own, or women with same-sex partners, often bring less of an emotional burden, but face different uncertainties.
There are also patients who come to the clinic with a non-cancer diagnosis that they may have known about since they were young, such as problems with their ovarian reserve or uterus.
‘The woman who has been trying to have a baby for years and suffers month after month of failure is not the same as the one who comes with the dream of starting a family, without emotional distress. That is why each case is unique, and the psychological approach must be adapted to the individual needs of each person,’ explains Raquel Urteaga.
Reproductive health grief
In the case of women who have been unable to achieve pregnancy for years, they ‘must grieve for their reproductive health at the moment they begin treatment. That is to say, they leave that first gynaecologist’s visit, with the tests, with their history of failed pregnancies and with a diagnosis of infertility, and at that moment they have to accept they have a problem and need medical help. By this stage there is already a low mood, low self-esteem, sometimes they feel a certain social rejection and try to avoid situations with babies… Then thoughts come to mind such as: Why me?, Why is this happening to me?, I should have started earlier… And they blame themselves for having let time go by or for having prioritised a job or a house. In short, they blame themselves. These emotions, unless they are dealt with in time, can hinder the process and leave an important emotional mark for the future,’ explains Urteaga.
For all these reasons, it is best to be able to emotionally prepare for fertility treatment at the very beginning. ‘However,’ continues the expert, ‘not all people are affected at such intense levels. There are women who already have a lot of tools and are very capable of going through this without clearly being affected, but at other times, it can be really hard. This is a very hard road emotionally, with many ups and downs, and sometimes, if we are not lucky to get it right the first time or the second time, this journey takes a long time, and the emotional situations become more complicated.’
First psychological consultation: What to expect?
At the first visit, the main objective is to prepare ourselves emotionally for what is to come. This means:
- Psychoeducation: this approach involves providing clear information about the process, which reduces uncertainty and prevents major problems such as anxiety disorders or depression. ‘In the Psychology Unit, we develop specific therapies for assisted reproduction, which are usually brief but very effective. Our aim is to offer practical tools and to accompany the patient from the first visit onwards,’ says the expert fertility psychologist.
- Normalising emotions: the key is for the patient to know what is going to start happening, what things are normal along the way (anxiety, sadness, etc.), so that she can handle it more naturally and not panic when she experiences these emotional ups and downs, but rather learn to normalise them and understand that she will have to live with all of this for a while.
- Adjusting expectations: many patients come with the notion that they will succeed immediately, but it is essential to work with them on ‘controlled optimism’, weighing up all the possibilities, adjusting expectations to reality. We must not fall into unrealistic optimism, but accept that it could be a long process with ups and downs. Well informed, patients will quickly lower their expectations.
- Fostering resilience: In the Reproductive Psychology Unit, patients are also taught how to cope with difficulties along the way using emotional tools that allow them to persevere, even in the face of possible failures. Not all people are equally resilient, but this is a skill that is trained, and it is usually developed in the face of difficulties. In short, the idea is that the psychologists will help you through this moment knowing that you are going to have a bad time, that you are going to cry, that you are going to despair, and that all of this is part of the process, and, even so, they will help you to continue. This is what resilience is all about, which is trained by going through certain circumstances and coping with difficulties.
Therefore, during the first visit to our Psychology Unit specialised in Assisted Reproduction, patients are helped to adjust their expectations and begin to work on the emotions that will accompany them on their journey. At Tambre, the rest of the team (gynaecologists, nurses, auxiliary nurses, embryologists, patient care, etc.) also provide great support in their respective professions, which also helps in this process to remain resilient.
The benefits of psychological support
‘It was established more than 20 years ago that between 40 and 60 % of assisted reproduction patients suffer from anxious and/or depressive symptoms,’ says the expert. Experience shows that patients who have psychological support from the beginning experience the treatment in a more positive way, even when faced with negative results. In fact, there are women who, despite facing their third or fourth beta wait, report that the process is more manageable because they have learned to deal with it emotionally.
Despite the benefits of psychological support, there are still many patients who do not make use of it. As mentioned before, medical issues are prioritised in these processes, relegating the psychological aspect to the background until the symptomatology is so intense that it makes them stop and take care of themselves emotionally.
Urteaga encourages patients to consider it as another part of the treatment: ‘Emotional support is not a luxury, it is a necessity. Experiencing the process accompanied can make the difference between feeling it as a burden or as an opportunity.’
At Tambre, the emotional wellbeing of patients is a priority. That is why our multidisciplinary team works together to ensure that each woman feels accompanied at all stages of the treatment, offering the tools to face the process with confidence and resilience. If you need personalised advice for your fertility treatment or emotional support on this journey, do not hesitate to contact us through our contact form or by calling 91 411 61 11.
